flashes of red and that tight chested sensation that refused to go away, threatening to tip over and spill all over. control trying so hard to control. gained it then lost it and tried to cling onto it again. appalled by the mental and emotional state of being. appalled but afraid. ruins life.
more and more, thoughts seem repelled. there's diminishing harmony. feels so bad.
why make it home for darkness and silence. why not make it home when there's still some light, some laughter, some happiness, some hope of comfort. why leave before there is life in the house. why go into the sun leaving her all alone. with unimaginable ailments that plagues her. uncontrollable palpitations. to lay there in pain and suffering. while you, have a sun-kissed day.
there were hopes, to be dashed. promises, to be broken. what else is there?
while you were walking away
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